In honor of Mother’s Day, we asked our incredibly talented team of global wedding experts “As Wedding Professionals, how are you seeing mothers of the bride or groom getting involved in today’s modern weddings?”  Here’s what they said…

“For the majority of our recent weddings, the mother-of-the-bride and mother-of-the-groom, along with the bride, have taken very vocal roles in all of the decisions of the wedding decor and floral designs.  If a mother is paying for the wedding, then she is actively directing the decisions of the wedding details.  With the glut of online and printed information available, every client who comes to us is more informed, more detail-oriented and more knowledgeable about what will appear in the wedding!” {Jose Graterol, Jose Graterol Designs}

“We realize that destination weddings can be a challenging thing for mothers of the bride or groom, at least at the beginning. They fear that they won’t be in control of things or that they won’t have all traditions met.  Nevertheless, parents soon realize that destination weddings offer a great opportunity to spend real quality time as family, add new family members and probably meet new friends.Organizing a welcome fiesta and a rehearsal dinner for all attendees is the best way for mothers to get involved right from the beginning and start enjoying the wedding festivities.” {Sarai Flores and Martha Huerta, Signature Event Consulting & Design, Mexico}

“We feel it varies, from one couple to the next… Today’s modern bride has a sharper vision of what she wishes for her wedding day to be.  Also,  she has a busier schedule and time limitations, therefore mother’s of the bride and groom often act as support and a liaison between planer/vendors and couples.  We feel it works most of the times.  As long as they keep it as their children’s wedding (making them happy) and not their own, it works!” {Patty Nash, Patty Nash Photography}

“Mothers run the gamut from trusted advisors to pot stirrers! At the end of the day, a mother’s role is to be caring and supportive of what the bride and groom want their special day to be, and most mothers know that inherently.” {Harriette Rose Katz, Gourmet Advisory}

“We’ve definitely noticed a shift of more mothers being involved with the planning process compared to when we opened our doors ten years ago,.  Many  of our clients are busy professionals who are deferring decisions on decor or floral ideas to their mothers or mothers-in-law to be. We had a recent rehearsal dinner where the father of the groom was our main point of contact  so dads are getting involved now too! A number of mothers have Pinterest boards they’ve started (some even before the engagement, they tell us in confidence) or else they are collaborating with the bride on her board. Lots of great ideas coming forth and I’m always impressed at how in-tune these parents are with the direction the couple want to take their event. Pinterest has opened a whole new avenue for collaboration and it’s great to see the parents sharing their ideas with their children as it makes for a very personal affair.” {Larissa Banting, Weddings Costa Rica}

“Traditional roles of mothers have changed rather dramatically over the years.  In that many of my clients have achieved their career goals and financial wealth within their generation; hence, putting more power and control with the bride.  Despite this financial responsibility trend, Moms are still taking a prominent role in the celebrations of their children.  Since many are not absorbing the costs, they tend to be less involved in the design and financial decisions.  However, Moms are still evermore present at those important decision making moments such as choosing the location and the wedding dress.

Their names still proudly grace the printed invitation and reinforce their involvement as the ultimate host of the celebration.  In addition, many Moms are opting to host ancillary events such as showers, pre-luncheons and welcome cocktail parties in support of their children and this spectacular life-changing celebration!  And as a Mom myself, I am the first one to declare to my clients – “listen to your Mom and follow her lead because she ultimately really does know best!” {Diann Valentine, Living Well}

“A child’s wedding is one of the most important days in a mother’s life and to that extent they want the very best for them on their wedding day.  I have seen everything from mothers of brides and grooms being involved in every aspect of the wedding plans and details to simply being there for moral support along the way.  I have also seen very special interactions with mothers and their daughters and sons.  Recently a mother offered the buttons from her own bridal gown to use on the bride’s bouquet. Another mother of the groom helped her son tie is bow tie.  Many times I see mothers offering words of wisdom before the bride and groom walk down the aisle.” {Heather Lowenthal, Posh Parties}

“When I meet with clients at our studio for tastings, many couples invite their parents (and parents-in-law) to come along.  I love meeting with families over cake!  Having different opinions and palettes represented is a great way to begin working on the design.    Some members of older generations are more apt to have a traditional vision for the cake (white, columns, topper, etc.), but I’ve found that everyone responds to clean lines and beautifully-executed detail.” {Maggie Austin, Maggie Austin Cake}

“I’m seeing mothers-of-the-bride or groom helping to shape and support the design vision of the couple. They are also life-savers when it comes to logistics like scheduling, finalizing wording for invitations and minding many other details!” {Ceci Johnson, Ceci New York & Ceci Style}

“Every bride dreams of her wedding day, years before meeting the groom. Unfortunately, I think that mothers dream of their daughters of son’s weddings just as much. I see lots of parents getting in the way and changing plans that it does get in the way of the wedding setup or timing. For instance, I receive multiple emails or calls from brides asking for destination weddings and explaining how excited they are to have one, but change the plan as soon as the parents explain that they want to throw a big wedding with many guests that the couple haven’t even met. I just hope that parents realize that it’s once in a lifetime experience and the emotional envestment is much greater than the financial one.” {Tasneem Alsultan Photography}

“Mothers of both the bride and groom play a different role in todays weddings. The Mother of the Groom is typically more in the back ground and doesn’t get involved in the detailing of the actual wedding. Where as the mother of the bride is complete opposite. The Bride typically turns to the Mother for guidance and support throughout the planning process and most mothers will dive right in and assist where can. There are times that I have seen a mother taking complete control over the planning and then the bride will get almost pushed into the background.

Weddings are a lot to plan and when it comes down to it, it is the bride and grooms day and they have to plan according to what they want for their special day.” {Kerry Harter, Catering Sales Manager, Acqualina Resort and Spa on the Beach}

“Mothers of the bride or groom are heavily involved in the process of selecting, designing, and wording the custom stationery suite with us. As the save the dates and invitations set the tone for the wedding and wedding weekend, we find that it is critical to involve not just the bride and groom but also their family members who are hosting and/or have a strong opinion, which often means the the mother of the bride and mother of the groom.

From the thickness of the paper, to the style of custom hand lettering, to the hue of edging ink, to all the various parts which will be included in the invitations and then the day of the celebrations, mothers, as experienced hostesses, have a keen eye for what they want the stationery to look like and delight in the level of customization and confidential logistics guest list management services we offer.

Mothers of the bride and groom thoroughly enjoy being involved in the creative process and also love knowing that they can entrust the creation and production to us so they may focus on all aspects of wedding planning which they enjoy the most!” {Emilie Dulles, Dulles Designs}